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Scrimping and Caving

29 Apr

A few weeks back, after abandoning potty training due to the onset of trauma, Mom and Buried and I took a quick run to Target.

While there, we decided to buy some off-brand diapers to get us through the next few weeks, enough time for Detective Munch to emerge from his PTSD (Potty Traumatic Stress Disorder) and get back on the potty train.

The cheapo diapers turned out to not be the best idea, as they were cheapo for a reason: they leaked worse than Julian Assange.

Which got me thinking. Maybe I shouldn’t shortchange my son.

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Words With Toddlers

9 Apr

In certain situations, say, a dinner party, or a funeral, conventional wisdom holds that some subject matter is off-limits. Some topics are just a tad more provocative than others and have a tendency to cause unnecessary tension when broached.

It’s better for everyone if typically contentious or potentially divisive topics are avoided, such as: politics; religion; a fondness for the Yankees; an appreciation for the Red Hot Chili Peppers; money.

There are no guarantees those topics will raise any hackles with your specific company, but they are more likely to than others. So it’s usually best to stay away.

The same holds true when you’re in the company of toddlers.

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Going National!

26 Mar

Yesterday, one of my blog entries – my Gender Neutral piece from December – was featured on the Huffington Post.

Now that I’m a superstar, I kind wanted to burn all my bridges and let my enemies know how I really feel, until I realized that my enemies won’t even bother reading this. Huffington Post, HuffPost Parents, @HuffPostParents, gender, gender roles, parenting, toddlers, flaming, message boards, trolls, dads

Then I remembered that this is the internet! Of course my enemies will read this! What’s the internet for if not to anonymously tear someone a new one? Like this guy, who took exception to my open-minded take on gender roles, and why I don’t really mind if someone mistakes my son for a girl:

“Parents like you are what is wrong with this country and children these days.” AWESOME!

So yeah, now that I am getting flamed on comment boards, I think it’s safe to say I’ve totally made it.

So thanks for reading, I’ll never forget you; especially if you share the HuffPo link with all your friends!

Zombie Post: Home Court Disadvantage

22 Mar

The last time March Madness rolled around, I had a full-time job. The job afforded me the flexibility to work from home one day a week, and on a day like today – the second day of the tournament – such a set-up seemed ideal.

Of course, working from home wasn’t all it was cracked up to be, as I was never able to be as helpful to my wife as she would have liked, just as my days as a stay-at-home dad aren’t spent boozing and watching sports. Except for when my kid naps.

You can read all about the double-sided sword that working from home proved to be in the post I’ve resurrected below. And I know half of you banged out sick today, so you have time.

Original Post: Home-work: Almost as Bad as Actual Homework

Stressed Augmentation

19 Mar stress, parenting, sleep, toddlers, dads, lifestyle, family, parenting, stress, anxiety, pop culture, Twin Peaks, Leland Palmer

In many ways, having kids is great.

I can’t think of a lot of examples right now, but I like interacting with the hot moms at the playground, and I’ll probably be able to get a dog out of this whole thing pretty soon, since my son is obsessed and my wife can’t tell him no. So those are some perks. Plus, kids change your perspective and make you a better person and shift your priorities and let you see outside yourself and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Those Z’s are purely figurative, by the way, because the flip-side to that “I’ve never been happier!” coin is that children also steal your sleep, drain your finances, shred your lifestyle, eliminate your free time and, I’m learning, increase your blood pressure.

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Dadding Practice

7 Feb gambling, children, parenting, fatherhood, education, learning, chuck e. cheese, nutrition, values, family, pop culture, movies, life lessons

Before he was even a twinkle in my eye, I had some ideas about what I wanted to teach my hypothetical son. Most of us do; without necessarily meaning to, we all take stock of what worked for us as kids, what we vow never to do as parents, what values we consider most important, etc. When you finally have children of your own, it’s a bit of a thrill to realize just how important you are to them, and how much influence you have over their development.

But my son is only two; it’s a bit early to tell him to always wear a rubber and when to double down. He needs to be able to swing off a tee before I can toss any real heat his way. But that doesn’t stop me from occasionally buzzing one by his ear.

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14 Dec

I joke a lot about how difficult parenting is & how much of a hassle children can be, but there’s not a parent among us who wouldn’t rather suffer 5000 more tantrums than endure what the parents of the lost in Newtown are going through today.

My heart goes out to all of them.

Hug your kids.

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